This is going to be one of those posts where I make excuses for not blogging. I know it's a "no-no" for doing that, and probably even a bigger "no-no" for saying that it's a "no-no," but I figured I should break my silence not necessarily to inform everyone (though that is one reason), but to use this space as my own personal pressure valve. My mind has a way of bouncing ideas around at a million miles a minute (the price of being a girl I guess) and I need to calm the craziness a little.
Since we got married, summer has almost always been a time of change for us, and this summer is no different. Keola continues to apply for jobs, a few of which cropped up in Hilo. Even better, we know we'll have a place in Hilo and a car whether we get a job there this summer or not, so if nothing else, a move to Hilo seems inevitable. My grandma and her husband will be living in the the Mainland for a couple of years, and they need someone to watch their house AND drive their car.
Then, a couple of days ago Keola gets a call from a big university on the mainland wanting to interview him for an academic advisor position in their athletic department. Keola LOOOVES sports and academic advising (counseling without the drama as he terms it). This would be a dream come true for him. One of the benefits we're most excited about is the free tuition for employees AND spouses. Yes. I could feasibly get another degree FOR FREE.
Of course, we've done the mainland thing twice before and came home twice. The first time was because we found something better back at home, and the second time was just a disaster.
I didn't think we would end up in the mainland again, but the more I think about it, the more I can see how it would be good for us. The pay is better than anything we could get here, and the cost of living SO MUCH LOWER. It just scares me that we don't know when (or IF) we'll ever live in the islands again, and how that will affect Noweo. I may have to revise my Hawaiian-speaking, hula dancing surfer girl vision of her just a bit. It just breaks my heart to rip her from her cousins and ESPECIALLY Keola's grandma, and I HATE that we won't be a quick island hop away from parents and grandparents. Fortunately, we would be moving to an area that has lots of family and friends so it wouldn't be that difficult of a transition.
Needless to say, as I've contemplated the turn our lives may take in the next few months, DIY air fresheners, a mashup of my favorite Etsy macbook air cases, and my latest business ideas just don't seem like very appealing blog topics to me. My zest for blogging has waned as my mind has been occupied with ALL THIS. And the worst part about it? Nothing's even happened yet. Keola's interview is Tuesday and so far we haven't heard back from any Hilo jobs. I'm not sharing big news. I'm sharing the POSSIBILITY of big news. It's all in this beautiful overactive mind of mine. Ugh. Can you imagine if I drank coffee?
In fact, the only REAL news I have is that Keola's hours got slashed from 19 a week to 3 a week, and only for CERTAIN types of work he does, not all the other work he does. Just splendid. So whatever happens, it has to happen FAST.
The other night after putting the kids to sleep I slumped down on the couch next to Keola who asked if I was ok. "Yeah...there's just so much going on right now," to which he said "Um...there's nothing going on right now." Oh yeah. Right. WHY CAN'T HE JUST FREAK OUT A LITTLE FOR ONCE IN HIS LIFE INSTEAD OF BEING THE COOL, CALM SANE ONE?
Where would I be without him? Oh this is so classic ME. If anyone can direct me to the off-switch in my brain I will be forever grateful. In the meantime, I'll be here...imagining mypossible life in New Town U.S.A. and how perfectly pin-worthy it will most certainly be. Help. Me.