Yesterday Keola and I went to Waimea for part 1 of our 2 part natural childbirth class. It's taught all day for two Saturdays so we'll go back again next week. I wouldn't say I learned anything REALLY new, because let's face it, I've been reading everything I can get my hands on about pregnancy, labor, birth, and the becoming a new mom. What I DID get from this first day of classes was an affirmation that I am gaining the right PERSPECTIVE, that my body was designed to birth and feed babies, that it knows how to grow a baby and therefore knows how to push a baby out, that the hormones involved with birthing and bonding with a baby are miraculous and cannot be duplicated by science, that my baby is a person who can sense my emotions; therefore if I am fearful, she will be fearful and her first lessons will be lessons of mistrust because fear is the opposite of trust. In labor, we learned that fear creates tension, tension creates pain, and pain creates more fear. The body closes up at a time when it needs to open. Conversely, trust allows you to relax, give up control and allow your body to do its' work. The body begins to open, and as it does, we learn to trust the process more, continuing the cycle of relaxing and opening. I trust myself. I trust my body. I trust my husband to be there for me as he has always been. I trust my baby that she will move exactly as she needs to, and I trust that she trusts me.

As I near 30 weeks, and begin my 10 week countdown, I feel a surprising sense of peace and closeness to her and Keola. Neither of us can wait to hold her and give her all of our love.